Can I have some?

welcome to my blog.

a place to post. a place to eat oreos. a place to vent. a place to heal.

i started this blog so i could use a different outlet besides munching on fattening oreos. as if that has done any good... *mind wanders to oreo package in the house...*

then i realized that oreos can be semi symbolic. if you are are that crazy about oreos that is. which... i am.

eating oreos is therapeutic for me. when i am struggling or when i need a pick me up. they have chocolate. and sugar. both of which help lift my mood. not to mention that i eat them soaked with milk, which is my miracle drink.

i post my posts to not only get stuff out. there may be people who read my blog who have been in the same kind of situations as i have. i hope reading them and knowing that others have gone through things like i have, will be to you what eating oreos does to me.

and yes. i didn't capitalize anything in here. i just felt like it. deal with it.

munch up.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Thanksgiving Thanks

I know I'm kind of late with this, but I thought I'd write down the many things I am grateful for. Not in any particular order.
  • My wonderfully wonderful husband who is truly amazing.
  • My two adorable children who mean so much to me.
  • The gospel in my life and all that that entails - the scriptures, praying, the atonement, gathering together to worship as brothers and sisters, and many more aspects. I would be so lost without it.
  • My wonderful family who brought me up with the gospel.
  • Trials. Why you may ask? The greater the trial, the greater the peace after you endure and get through the trial. And I love to help people and what better way then to help them through the same trials?
  • I am grateful that Tuesdays and Thursdays are what they are instead of Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Tuesdays and Thursdays are the days when Rocket Scientist is gone basically all day. He doesn't get home until 10:30ish at night. And he comes home for dinner, but that is it. It isn't even a very long break for dinner. In any case, I'm grateful that it is only twice a week instead of three times a week.
  • My wonderful ward, and the friends I have made in it. One in particular, though sadly, she is moving soon for her husband is graduating after the semester is over. And we just started our friendship, but I am extremely grateful for her. If not for Mindy, I might not have made it through these last few weeks.
  • Christmas. Can you think of any other time where the world is literally brighter?
  • All my many temporal blessings. I may not have as much as some of you, but I have a whole lot more then others in the world.
Well, that is what I could think of, though there are many more. Here's a big shout out to all the many people who are such a blessing in my life! Thank you!!

Tuesday, November 27, 2007


I am so proud of myself today that I decided to write to tell you all. Today was the first time (maybe second) when our table was fully wiped down since Little Angel was born, and I have the Christmas runner on it! Also, our entertainment center doesn't have any things on it that aren't decorations, and I painted a whole lot of blocks for Bug's Christmas present (with the help of RA). I have also cleared out the sink, and ready to do more. Our front room (or living room, or family room, whatever you want to call it) and kitchen is actually bearable to look at! Give myself a pat on the back! Hope your days were as successful as mine, and that you feel good about what you did today!

Friday, November 23, 2007


Bonjour!! (that means hello formally)

Well, (Bon...) I am (je suis) learning (.....) French! (fran├žais)

Don't worry though, I'm not going to type like that this whole time. I just thought it would be fun to learn how to speak a different language. Everyone (most everyone) starts with Spanish, and my brother told me I couldn't pronounce the words properly, so I decided to start with French! Anyway, that is what's going on! Talk to you later!

Salut! (bye or hi.... informal)

Monday, November 19, 2007

Prefered Pain?

Who would prefer pain? Sounds a little crazy huh?

Well, when I was giving birth to Bug, I wasn't quite sure what to expect, and I had an open mind when it came to an epidural or not. I wasn't quite ready for the pain and ended up asking for an epidural. Once it started working, I really couldn't feel the rest of the birth, and Bug came out in 20 min.

While I was pregnant with Little Angel, I was thinking that I wanted to have a "natural" birth, but wasn't sure if I would be ready for it on this one. I did start meditating a week before, not with the thought of using it to get through pain, but for other reasons. Some people use meditation to get through pain I knew, but I didn't start for that reason, I figured I started too soon to actually use it for that amount of pain.

So I went into the birth process with my mind still open about the epidural. Though I hadn't started meditating for dealing with the pain of giving birth, I thought it couldn't hurt. When the pain got to be so much that I couldn't ignore it with I Love Lucy episodes (or M*A*S*H or the Andy Griffith Show all of which were playing on TV Land when I was in labor), I started to do what I did when I meditate, close my eyes, and just concentrate on my breathing. That seemed to help a little, so I kept it up. But once again, the pain got too much for my feeble attempts to ignore it. Little Angel came 30 min. later. Don't ask me how I got through that longest half hour in my life, but I did without an epidural. By then it was pretty much too late for it to take much of an effect. Rocket Scientist did help by reminding me to think about Bug's adorable cuteness, and think of other things that took me somewhere else then the pain.

In any case, I look back at Little Angel's birth with more fondness then I do Bug's. Why is that? I'm not exactly sure. Maybe because I went through the pain, and the trial of it and made it. Maybe it was something different. I'm not really sure, but I do know that I look back at it and seem to enjoy the memory of Little Angel's more then Bug's. Trails aren't necessarily fun things to go through, but when you are through them is when the true joy comes.

Friday, November 16, 2007

I'm number 10!!

I talked to Sandy today. Sandy is my lactation consultant from WIC. We talked about many things that I had questions about, but I won't go into that. The main thing that she did was give me a huge emotional boost. I have been having a hard time getting through each feeding with Little Angel because of the struggles that we have been having. I started to dread when he would need to eat again.

Anyway, before I go off on a tangent (I have done that a lot today...), one thing that Sandy told me today is that 9 out of 10 women would have given up on breastfeeding with all the things we have gone through these last few weeks. She said that she knows that because she has talked to the other nine. Then she said I was her number 10. I have had a better day then I have had since Little Angel was born because I was so elated with her praise. I mean it is one thing to have my sisters or mom say that I'm doing a good job, but with my mind, I can brush that away really easy thinking that they just say that because they love me, or whatever. Sandy is nice, but I doubt that she loves me, and she isn't part of my immediate family, so it is totally different then having my family tell me I'm doing good. I do need the praise from my family, everyone does, but it was easier to brush it off (having a depressing mood and everything) then it was from someone totally unrealated.

So, normally you would think you would want to be number one? I'm just glad that I'm number ten, and all the help I have had from my Father in Heaven and my friends and family who have helped me through this hard time. I hope that it will be getting better and better throughout the next little bit.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Which is which?

Well, here they both are. Which one is Little Angel, and which one is Bug? Who knows?

I wanted to find two pictures where they were doing basically the same thing, but I couldn't. This is the closest I could get with them in basically the same pose. Anyone know who is who??

I am constantly suprized at how I get the feeling that I'm holding Bug, when it is really Little Angel. They are really look a lot like each other. Makes me wonder how Little Angel will look in later years, will he look almost the same as Bug? I can't wait to compare pictures of them both walking or something.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

I love yous

The other day (I've been so busy with new baby things) I said good night to Bug. I gave him a kiss, started his bedtime music, and walked out the door with an "I love you" echoing out of my mouth. As I am about to close the door, what do I hear?

"I oe u". Now that might not mean a whole lot, and I might have been imagining it sounding like "I love you", but that is what I got from it. I was elated. For the first time, I hear those words come out of my toddlers mouth and it made all the depressing days since Little Angel was born (my mom calls it After Baby Blues - it is like how you feel right after Christmas) go away. If only for a little bit (until Little Angel is crying for another feeding).

All I can say is don't put off letting someone know how you feel. People can't read minds. I love you all!

Monday, November 12, 2007

Trains vs. Trucks

Saying that my nephew is obsessed with trains would be an understatement. But he has led me to wonder if Bug will be just as obsessed about something. He doesn't really seem to have any favorites right now, just kind of plays with everything the same. I only have noticed what he seems to enjoy more. Lately he has been pushing around one of his toy trucks a lot. He also really seems to enjoy driving that truck over everything and everyone in the process. I think he likes the challenge of going over the toys and things. We have a truck book for him, and he likes to look through it a lot.

Maybe we'll have a truck enthusiast on our hands...

Saturday, November 10, 2007

First wrestling match

Well, today Bug and Daddy had their first wrestling match. Bug was sadly under matched. That is until he had his handicap of a truck to sabotage Rocket Scientist with.

I just thought I'd share pictures of the match. It was a tough call, but Bug won the match. They had a great time, and Bug was able to use up a lot of his pent up energy. He doesn't really get to wrestle with Mommy very often right now. Hope you enjoy the pictures!

Tuesday, November 6, 2007


Today I found out that I have mastitis (a breast infection). I had a fever yesterday, but I didn't really check myself for more signs of it until today. One of my neighbors knew of my fever last night, seeing as Rocket Scientist needed to go to the store, I wasn't up to it, or watching Bug that whole time. We asked her to tend for a little bit. But I never knew that would lead to what happened today.

She has been doing things for me all day long! She bought me some disposable breast pads, a hand sanitizer, gel breast pads that can go in the fridge, food, and anything else you can think of. She has done some of my laundry. She has been making sure that I rest and eat (which is a hard thing when you feel woosy). She picked up my meditation from Smith's, and has been in and out all day making sure I am doing all right. I still haven't mentioned everything, but I don't want to bore you all to death with all the help she has been.

I have never been catered to so much by someone who is not in my family. Or should I say my mortal family. I owe her so much, she has been a life saver today. Rocket Scientist had to be away almost all day today, and she has been so much help. Though she will probably never read this, I wanted to thank her and everyone who has helped me in times of need. Sometimes it is hard to accept help, but it is needed so others get the chance to serve. Just thought I'd share that. I am feeling better by the way, after only one pill! I hope everything will be better soon.

Oh, and miracles of miracles, I have had Little Angel on the breast this whole day! Not one bottle! We had been struggling with that. Hope all is well with everyone who reads this. Not just my family and friends by the way.

Saturday, November 3, 2007

The simple mind triumphs again!!!

Hurray!!! This is the first post I am doing on my own computer! I started my blog when my computer was almost shot, and I actually started it on Rocket Scientist's computer. Today we found out what was wrong, and now I am posting on my very own computer!!!

I'm enjoying this blogging thing probably for two reasons. I feel like my friends and family will get to know me better, and I am doing it all by myself. I would have never thought that I could make and have a website all to my own, and know how to do things to it. I guess that is why I get a little upset when Rocket Scientist decides (or seems to decide) what is best or the best way to do things regarding my blog. That happened a bit today. I was wanting to put the picture of my new little family that you now see. Only when we posted it, it was too big, and looked funny. Rocket Scientist was at his computer, and I was holding Little Angel. I told Rocket Scientist how I would do it, and he decided that he wanted to do it his way (more complicated). He tried and tried to get it just right, doing it his way. He finally gave up (I think after I mentioned that I feel good when I can do things my way.... probably because Rocket Scientist is such a solver) and did it my way. He only had to do it once, and it worked perfectly. Simple mind TRIUMPHS!!!!!

Next situation.... my computer. Rocket Scientist was trying to get it all fixed throughout the entire day. He finally ran out of ideas, and mentioned something about the two CD drives. I said well, take them out. So he did. Guess what???? My computer turned on!!! Amazing! Simple mind triumphs again!!!!! It turned out that one of the CD drives really had some issues, and at first my computer kept freezing when it was just sitting there with one web browser up. Then it started not turning on, and freezing while booting up with the error "Detecting Array". Whatever that meant. Rocket Scientist tried and tried a bunch of different things, and nothing worked. It was when he said that it was detecting the CD drives but not the Hard Drives. So that was when I said take the CD's off. It was actually the other way around, but like I said, SIMPLE MIND TRIUMPHS AGAIN!!!

Here I go, bragging about my kids

So, what do you think about the new look? I envisioned something like this when I picked this template anyway, and Rocket Scientist helped me with it so it would be just right. Looks more like Oreos!

Bug is really being cute with Little Angel lately. At first he was upset because he was no longer the center of attention, but I think he has moved into the groove nicely. Whenever Little Angel starts fussing because of hunger, Bug runs over to the door of our bedroom (where Little Angel sleeps) and points at him, then comes back to me to let me know he is crying. Sometimes he will grab a book, sit next to Little Angel and "read" the book to Little Angel. He also comes up and pats Little Angel on the head very gently and or kisses him on the head. It is really sweet. Bug is still trying his hardest to get what he wants, and has a hard time obeying, but at least he isn't hostile toward Little Angel.

Hope you enjoyed me prattling on about my sons. Bug really is sweet, and I'm excited that everything is going ok with the new baby.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

What we are doing

Rocket Scientist is going to school, and will be for the next two years at least.

I'm taking it easy, seeing as if I don't I am made to if I push too hard.

Bug is finally starting to seem like he can handle having a new brother. He is kissing Little Angel on the head and patting his head very softly, and all on his own. Of course, he can also get too rambunctious. Sometimes he trys to get Little Angel to grab hold of a toy or something. I can't seem to get him to understand that all Little Angel can do right now is sleep and eat.

Little Angel really isn't doing much, but can you blame him? He went through the same thing I did, and I know that I'm exahusted! He did roll from tummy to back yesterday though. At only a week old?? I'm not sure if it was a fluke or not.